At 3:17 a.m., while the rest of the ward napped on gurneys, Maya filled a 2 ml syringe from an ampoule labeled modafinil 100 mg/ml. She slid the needle into the IV port of a resident who’d been on his feet for 22 hours straight. “Count backward from ten,” she whispered. He hit seven wide-eyed, […]
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Monday, 6:15 a.m. The kettle hisses, the kids are hunting for left shoes, and your head feels like it’s still locked in weekend mode. One 5-ml sip of Provigil suspension and the fog lifts before the toast pops. No espresso tremor, no triple-shot breath–just clean, quiet alertness that lets you finish the commute, ace the […]
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I used to set two alarms–one for 6:00 a.m. and a back-up at 6:05–because I knew my hand would still be groping for the snooze button. Then a friend who works night shifts at Hamburg airport slipped me a tiny amber bottle and said, “Two drops on the tongue, wait thirty seconds, thank me later.” […]
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My college roommate used to set three alarms, chug two espressos, and still nap under his desk. One grey Tuesday he showed up with a blister pack of Provigil, swallowed half a tablet, and coded straight through until sunrise–no jitters, no crash, just steady, quiet focus. The next week the whole flat was ordering from […]
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My neighbor Dave used to set four phone alarms, a wind-up clock and still slept through the fire-station siren down the road. Three weeks after his GP scribbled Provigil solution on the script, I watched him water the roses at 6:45–before the paper landed on the porch. He didn’t grow wings; he just opened his […]
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My roommate, Jess, used to ration her Provigil like it was the last chocolate bar on earth–half a tablet on Monday, quarter on Tuesday, hope for the best by Friday. Then her neurologist’s assistant slid a small plastic card across the counter and said, “Try this; the first fill is ten bucks.” Jess blinked, waiting […]
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Last Tuesday the dog barked at 2:17, the baby followed at 2:19, and by 2:43 I was staring at a spreadsheet that looked like alphabet soup. At 6:00 I had to pitch the quarterly numbers to Tokyo over Zoom. I poured 0.5 ml under my tongue, tasted faint citrus, and forgot about coffee for the […]
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I was halfway through a 12-hour night shift when the floor started to pulse like a bad nightclub. Three espressos deep and still nodding off, I remembered my roommate’s stash–small white pills she called “shift savers.” One half-tab, a glass of water, and 25 minutes later the conveyor belts stopped looking like pillows. That was […]
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Montreal commuter train, 6:42 a.m. The guy beside me is balancing a take-out coffee, a pharmacy bag, and a hardcover copy of War and Peace. He opens the bag, pops a small white tablet, and within two stops he’s highlighting paragraphs like the train lights just flipped from dim to surgical. Same pill my cousin […]
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Last Tuesday I opened my laptop at 05:14, two hours before the Berlin-NYC call. The coffee tasted like burnt cardboard and the screen still showed the same 47-slide deck I’d abandoned at 02:00. One 200 mg tablet, a glass of water, and at 05:27 the sentences stopped wobbling. By 05:52 I had chopped the deck […]